Squad Leading : A Memoir Part II

Okay here we go, PART 2!!

Let’s set the scene, I’m in my first country with Gap G, Romania. One morning I was having quiet time in my room and spending time with the Lord. The Lord was speaking some pretty topical things over my life. I was really sitting with what it means to receive and wear a crown of righteousness(2 Timothy 4:8). The Lord was impressing a phrase on my heart “growing in maturity, preparing for royalty” I was chewing on 1 Peter 2:9,10

“But you are A CHOSEN RACE, A royal PRIESTHOOD, A HOLY NATION, A PEOPLE FOR God’s OWN POSSESSION, so that you may proclaim the excellencies of Him who has called you out of darkness into His marvelous light; for you once were NOT A PEOPLE, but now you are THE PEOPLE OF GOD; you had NOT RECEIVED MERCY, but now you have RECEIVED MERCY.”

I was fired up to share this with my squad and walk this out proudly and reverently to the people we were ministering to. Then, I felt that the Lord was actually calling me to an awareness of being His possession and royal priesthood and what He was really speaking over me was…..

Ya, that’s right… LONGSUFFERING. 

How did we take such a sharp turn, Lord? How does this even relate to Royal Priesthood or being God’s Possession? Well, after I believe that the Holy Spirit has spoken anything over my life, I go to scripture. I started to dig into 2 Timothy 4:8, 1 Peter 2:9-10, Revelation 3:11, Matthew 24:9-14. 1 Peter 2 reminded me of Who I am because of Christ and brought me to the conclusion that I have a responsibility as someone who has a new identity and received mercy. 2 Timothy reminded me that I have a crown waiting for me and the responsibility of that crown is Revelation 3:11 to be holding tightly to that crown, so that it wouldn’t be taken from me or to not let my guard down in the process of living life. Matthew 24:9-10 reminded me of what’s at stake, whether that’s literally during the end times or even in a tough season of my life. Then, all of these scriptures led me back to Jesus and His life. I began to ponder how Jesus lived out these things while He walked this earth.

If you know anything about Jesus – which I know y’all do – you would know that He was a man of endurance, suffering from the day He was born. An eternal God was birthed into a world and destined to die a gruesome death by the people He healed, encouraged and indelibly saved. A King chose to suffer and die, in order to spend eternity with His image bearing creation. He became sin, who knew no sin that we might become His righteousness (2 Cor 5:21) Still, Father God suffers a little longer so that all might come to repentance. (2 Peter 3:9) I would say, Longsuffering is the birth of compassion, mercy and grace, without it, all of us wouldn’t stand a chance. We wouldn’t understand God’s heart for us. Longsuffering took its final breath on the cross, saying “It is Finished”. Our debt was paid by Jesus Christ, who willingly took this upon Himself so we don’t have to do this (suffer) as long as He does, even though we brought it upon ourselves. God took ownership of us through Jesus, thus being His possession, offering us the opportunity to capitalize on His sacrifice so we could get to know our Heavenly Father like He intended in the first place. By His blood we are washed clean of the curse of sin (1 John 1:7), we are a New Creation (2 Cor 5:17) and now called Sons and Daughters of the most High King(2 Cor 6:18). Heirs with Christ as His Brothers and Sister’s.(Hebrews 2:11//Mark 3:34,35) 

ISN’T THAT INCREDIBLE??

Anyway, back to the story. In the middle of my peaceful, intimate quiet time with the Lord, The Holy Spirit whisper’s to my heart:

Put yourself in my position and just envision that for a moment. How would you feel? You could imagine my face when I heard that….. 

Longsuffering, Lord, What? What do you have in store for us, for me? That you would call me into Longsuffering? I inquired as to whether He was speaking this over my squad in its entirety or just me and didn’t hear anything right away. So, I just kept praying and working through what was right in front of me. I combed through the Word looking for more scriptures that spoke to suffering and what that meant for me as a believer. Here’s what I found:

1. “Consider it all joy, brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”

   James 1:2-4

2. “In this you greatly rejoice, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials, so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which is perishable, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ;”

   1 Peter 1:6,7

3. “These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world.”

   John 16:33

4. For to this you were called, because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that you should follow His steps: “Who committed no sin, Nor was deceit found in His mouth”; who, when He was reviled, did not revile in return; when He suffered, He did not threaten, but committed Himself to Him who judges righteously;”1 Peter 2:21-23

There are many more scriptures in regards to trial and suffering but these are a few that I have been holding onto, along with James 1:12. Some of these I have read before but this time, I knew I would really need them to help me keep perspective for what was lying ahead of me. 

How does this apply to anyone who might Squad Lead in the future? Well, let me tell you – actually, let me say this to any leader of people in general. LISTEN TO THE HOLY SPIRIT!!!!! We are to follow the breath of God that was deposited in us. (Galatians 5:25) And for a good reason!! When we don’t understand what He’s saying or why He’s speaking something over us, He can be trusted because He knows what lies ahead. We don’t need all of the details to be prepared, just faith and hope in Jesus.

In this case, God was preparing me for some unpredictable set of circumstances that would be the hardest to endure and understand. None of which were really as big as they seemed at the time, but big enough that I would feel so defeated, highly defensive and deeply misunderstood. 

As a Squad Leader, it’s so important to remain faithful and moldable in the hands of the Father. We are dealing with the hearts of humans who are learning more about who they are, who they want to be and Who they are actually following. It’s not easy and most of the time you’ll feel like you literally aren’t doing anything for the people around you because you can’t see the renewing of their heart and mind unless your straining your eyes and looking, but really, your consistent dependence on the Triune God will speak volumes to the people you’re leading. Especially, in times of struggle and discouragement.

Like I said, this is a series – so stay tuned!! Part 3 will be up soon.

Thanks for coming back and reading, I hope you’re not discouraged, that’s not my heart for this at all. I’m just trying to share my experience and be honest!

All For Him, 

Marissa